Different Terminology

School:
A place where Papa Pays and Son Plays.

Life Insurance:
A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.

Nurse:
A person who wakes you up to give you sleeping pills.

Marriage:
It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.

Divorce:
Future tense of Marriage.

Tears:
The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.

Compromise:
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

Conference Room:
A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

Office:
A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Yawn:
The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

Etc.! :
A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

Committee:
Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

Diplomat:
A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

Miser:
A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.

Boss:
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

Doctor:
A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.